12 Years Of Karate Finally Pays Off

The New Avengers Trailer

Just came out today...




     Looks pretty fucking awesome, amirite? Unfortunately, it's not out until May, but it's directed by Josh Wheeden of Firefly fame. Dope.

Some Useful Facts

Lair Of The Kraken Discovered. Seriously.

 

   Fuck yeah! The Kraken was real. Check this shit out:

A giant sea monster, the likes of the mythological kraken, may have swum Earth's ancient oceans, snagging what was thought to be the sea's top predators — school bus-size ichthyosaurs with fearsome teeth.

The kraken, which would've been nearly 100 feet (30 meters) long, or twice the size of the colossal squid, Mesonychoteuthis, likely drowned or broke the necks of the ichthyosaurs before dragging the corpses to its lair, akin to an octopus's midden, according to study researcher Mark McMenamin, a paleontologist at Mount Holyoke College in Massachusetts.

Evidence for the kraken and its gruesome attacks comes from markings on the bones of the remains of nine 45-foot (14 meter) ichthyosaurs of the species Shonisaurus popularis, which lived during the Triassic, a period that lasted from 248 million to 206 million years ago. The beasts were the Triassic version of today's predatory giant squid-eating sperm whales.

     Ok, now it gets downright weird...

"I was aware that anytime there is controversy about depth, there is probably something interesting going on," McMenamin said. And when he and his daughter arrived at the park, they were struck by the remains' strangeness, particularly "a very odd configuration of bones."

A giant sea monster, the likes of the mythological kraken, may have taken out ichthyosaurs the size of school buses, arranging their vertebrae in curious linear patterns with nearly geometric patterns.

The etching on the bones suggested the shonisaurs were not all killed and buried at the same time, he said. It also looked like the bones had been purposefully rearranged, likely carried to the "kraken's lair" after they had been killed. A similar behavior has been seen in modern octopus.

   
     So the Kraken liked to decorate. Maybe Paula Dean is a fuckin' Kraken. Ever think of that?

Ron Paul OBVIOUSLY Cheated

     Are you one of those people that thinks Ron Paul might be getting the shaft in the newsmedia and from other Republicans (I am one of those, although I disagree with at least half the batshit stuff he says, I think we should be fair)? Check this out, from CBS news:

Rep. Ron Paul scored a decisive victory Saturday in a mock presidential election at the Values Voter Summit, trouncing fellow Texan, Gov. Rick Perry, but an organizer of the straw poll suggested ballot-stuffing may have skewed the results.

In a press conference following the announcement of the straw poll results at the annual Washington gathering of social conservatives, Family Research Council President Tony Perkins all but dismissed the results as irrelevant, citing 600 people who registered Saturday morning and, he said, "left after Ron Paul spoke."

A total of 1,983 ballots were cast. "You do the math," Perkins said.

A year ago in the same contest, Paul came in second-to-last. Speaking briefly with reporters before the straw poll results were announced, the Republican lawmaker said, "If I win, it wouldn't be as important to the media than if I lose."

     I love how that Perkins guy gets all catty at the end with that "you do the math" shit. Dude, if Republicans could do fucking math, then supply-side economics would not exist.

Another Facebook-Inspired Beatdown

  
      Facebook user Benito Apolinar, who hails from the great state of Texas, had posted a loving status update to his Facebook page on the anniversary of his mother's death. Then he waited for the "likes" to roll in. You know how that is: One finds a strange sense of fulfillment in the totally meaningless clicks of approval from friends and acquaintances and friends of acquaintances' friends.
     Well, the "like" from Dolores Apolinar, Benito's wife, never came. That led to a confrontation. ("Your passive-aggressive withholding of a Facebook 'like' is the social media equivalent of urinating on my dear mother's grave, you heinous and unfeeling whore!" he did not for sure say, but hopefully did.)
     Whatever words were exchanged, it quickly escalated into a physical altercation, during which Benito "hit" Dolores and "pulled her hair," according to the criminal complaint. Now he's facing battery charges.
     The moral of this story, America? Get off Facebook today, before some lunatic rips your hair out for not 'liking' the picture he put up of his grandma.

Here's Some Katt Williams To Make Your Monday Better

Oh yeah, it's Thursday. Here's Katt on parenting...



And on marijuana...