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Monday, March 28, 2011

Tokyo Electric Power VS. British Petroleum In A Gross Incompetence-off!!!

Let the debate begin! Which fucktarded energy company mishandled their self-inflicted 'disaster' with greater buffoonery, venery, finger pointing, and general total disregard for anyone or anything? (and if you think Tokyo Electric's nuclear accident wasn't self-inflicted, guess again -- they built it four and a half miles from one of the worlds most volatile faultlines. Brilliant. Was it because there no space left inside Mount Pinatubo?) Lets do a fun timeline...

Day 1 BP oil claims their platform blew up and they are leaking a small amount of oil. Their blowout preventer failed, and they just need to get it back online.
Day 1 Tokyo Electric claims that there is a small problem with their reactors. Their cooling pump malfunctioned, and they just need to get it back online.

Day 5 BP-News reports come out showing oil spewing all over the gulf killing sea animals, birds and slow-moving enviromentalists. They fail to get the blowout preventer online.
Day 5 TEP- New reports come out showing that their "small leak" is actually spewing radiation all over Japan, with reactors all over the plant leaking water, catching fire and blowing up. They fail to get the pumps online.

Day 7 BP- BP executive begin pumping sea water and heavy mud into the pipe in a failed attempt to stop the flow. BP execs admit they don't know what the fuck they're doing.
Day 7 TEP-Tokyo Electric begins pumping sea water into their reactors in an effort to cool them. The sea water leaks out or misses and the plan fails. Tokyo Electric execs admit they don't know what the fuck they're doing.

Day 13 BP- Tony whats-his-name proposes a "junk shot" shooting a bunch of shit into the pipe in a desperate to contain the oil. The plan is not approved, because it is stupid.
Day 13 TEP-Tokyo Electric proposes dumping a bunch of sand into the reactors in a desperate attempt to contain the radiation. The plan is not approved, because it is stupid.

Day 19 BP-Oil begins appearing all over the coasts and the leak is magnitudes worse than initially reported. The gulf coast is fucked for decades. Tens of billions of dollars are lost.
Day 19 TEP-Well, thats tomorrow, so who knows? Maybe some good news?

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